Blake Noble

I'm not too sure if I would get too familiar with the interior you're seeing here.

Yep, from the Chevy SS stockcar. That chop does a decent job of indicating what the real product may look like, but I also wouldn't base my opinions of the real car on it.

The Ute won't use the Calais' front clip, which is honestly the worst looking and busiest front clip out of the bunch. The VF will look better in SS trim, and it's likely the Ute will use a variation of the clip seen on the SS models. I'm with you in preferring the overall more consistant and crisper lines of the old VE and VEII models, but Holden is honestly showing the new Commodore in it's ugliest trim right now. Give it a little time.

Well, a revised version of the Caprice may continue to be sold as a Buick Park Avenue in China, so that probably explains why certain elements of the design would also translate well to a new Opel.

I do tend to think the new VF Commodore is a handsome sedan, although it isn't a knock out by any means. It's also unfortunate that I do get a minute and rather strange Acura RL-esque vibe from how the Calais model's front fascia interacts with the rest of the design. The SS model won't have that issue, but regardless I think it needs to be said. I'm with Camino in actually preferring the styling of the VE Commodore over this, although I still wouldn't kick one out of my driveway.

I thought I would try and build this post up into something more enjoyable to read than my usual banter about my volatile automotive love life. It's a little rough in spots, but I hope you guys like it.

Yesterday evening I decided that, given my hatred for my hateful old Astra hatchback has grown to burning new heights, I would pay a visit to Kentucky's largest independent auto auction — the Kentucky Auto Sales Pavilion, or KASP for short — located 30 miles north of me in Lexington and try to take home a beater or project car for less than $1,000 dollars. Here, it was certainly an obtainable concept and less of a challenge based on late Sunday night programs I had watched; numerous Clinton Administration-era vehicles seemed to cross the auction block here rarely ringing up at more than $1,500. It also seemed far less droll than spending countless future weeks of sifting through hyper-inflated used cars listed by pituitary retards on Craigslist. It didn't matter that I was willingly aware of the fact I was repeating a decision that has generally lead to disappointment numerous times, I wanted something that would at least be intact and functioning just enough to distract me from my decomposing blue piece of Euro trash. I arrived at the auction around 6:30 and parked in a muddy gravel parking lot located immediately to my right down a side road just off of the main highway. I walked into the main lobby, a little confused by the rather chaotic atmosphere enveloping the building. People of all financial means and backgrounds were everywhere. Some of them were families buying their newest driver something fit enough to make it back and forth to class and in and out of mischief. I walked up to the main counter and registered to bid on something for free, took some literature, a form that allowed you to make a pre-auction bid on a vehicle if you wanted to skip the fireworks that were to come later, and a handy stapled bundle of papers listing the cars up for bid. I then left the lobby and headed out to another gravel lot behind an open electrified gate to the left of the main building. As I walked along, I read through the listings and located the cars that coordinated with them. There were quite a few 2003 to 2004 Mustangs with under 80,000 miles, but they all seemed like they would be outside of my paltry budget. There was a very nice GMC Sierra up for auction, but again considering its more recent age and mileage I knew that it too wouldn't go for less than a few thousand dollars. From there I tried to lower my sights and checked out a recently decommissioned Crown Victoria Interceptor with a horrible set Auto Zone wheel covers, a higher mileage Jeep Liberty, a handful of random pickup trucks, and a salty old fourth-generation LT1 Firebird Formula. The Formula certainly caught my eye, but considering that a kid younger than I am was hovering around it like a junkyard dog, I knew it would be a quickly escalating fight past my thousand dollar limit come auction time. I decided to back away. From there I rambled on for a few moments longer, continuing to check out other cars on the list, but none of them were as interesting as that old Firebird. There were two Y2K-era Monte Carlos that could have made interesting beaters, but they just weren't speaking to me. As the sunlight faded into darkness, I continued to crawl around various vehicles until I finally spotted something that would reveal itself as something far more interesting than the old fire chicken, but for a different reason entirely. It was lot number "C 0065" on the fourth page of my list of cars, a black late '90s Chevrolet Camaro with just over 165,000 miles that somehow bared its scars quite poorly, its youth nearly evaporated. The clear coat had begun to bubble and peel like a bad sunburn on the front bumper and the headlamps were horribly jaundiced. The paint was down to the primer in small chips on top of the rear quarter panel next to the driver's side door. The passenger side window refused to roll up completely. Considering the fact this particular car brought back memories of my old Camaro that I owned during 2010 and early 2011, I decided to spend some extra time with it just for the sake of nostalgia. I opened the door and checked out the interior, which had almost finished decomposing into a rat's nest out of shear abuse and flagrant neglect. The driver's side power window and door lock control plate had completely busted out of the door panel. The console lid had been broken and ripped apart, the top thrown haphazardly in the back passenger side foot well. The sun visors were in complete disarray and did not want to stay in a normal, stationary position, the visor's elastic bands meant for holding letters and maps were stretched loose and hung like strips of melted flesh. During my depressing survey of the interior, I also noticed to my delight this particular Camaro had a manual gearbox just like my old one, although the leather boot had broken and fallen into the console. I decided to sit inside of it for a moment, just for my amusement. Better memories of my old Camaro began flooding back; memories of first taking it home on a snowy winter day after I had saved up the money from selling my old Regal; memories of disassembling the dash to install a new stereo and relocate the Camaro plaque to the center of the IP cover because that's how I thought "it should've been brand-new"; memories of taking it on a handful of trips to Louisville to buy and trade various guitars; memories of somehow managing to fit an amplifier almost two-thirds of my height into the hatch with the back seat folded down. I also remembered how that same Camaro always gave me constant mechanical grief with a new problem cropping up every other week, and how it even left me stranded going to work a few times. I pushed in the clutch, turned the key, and started the tired 3.8 liter V6. Even though the catalytic converter was obviously and painfully clogged, the exhaust note sounded just like that of my old car after I had it fitted with a cheap Flowmaster muffler I bought from Advance Auto Parts. That's when it hit me. As I started noticing some of the small details, I realized that this wasn't just some rag-tag kissing cousin to my old Camaro – it was my old Camaro. I noticed the dash plaque had been relocated to the dead-center of the IP bezel and had a bad wiggle from where I accidentally broke a leg or two off the backside of it trying to move it. The old window sticker was still in the owner's manual in the glovebox. As I walked around to the back of the car, the taillights were a set of “LT1-style” lights from an older Camaro that I had picked out of a junkyard. The muffler was, in fact, that cheap Flowmaster from Advance. Even though I had grown to hate that Camaro, I now felt nothing more than pity for it. Someone had certainly given it a life of misery and hell after I had let it go. Despite the fact I knew the car was good for nothing but trouble, I was honestly tempted to make a bid on it, just to have it back and give it another chance. While it wasn't reliable for me, it wasn't a bad car and didn't deserve to be trashed so horribly like it had. I ultimately decided to say a final goodbye to my old car and leave the auction after this. There really was nothing I felt was worth fighting over to take home. While I probably should have thrown a bid in on my old Camaro just for laughs, I don't regret walking away from it. I do regret that it had gotten too dark outside and the lighting was too poor to take a picture with my cell phone, though. It was certainly an odd meeting of chance. The only memento I have of this is the auction listings packet and, when I got home later, I double checked the VIN number on the sheet with some old records I kept of my old Camaro and they certainly do match. While the Astra will certainly be replaced as soon as the correct car presents itself, I can't help but to think of it suffering a similar fate. Although it has been anything but perfect, it hasn't been the problem child the Camaro used to be. Thinking of someone else sucking what little life it has left to give out of it is quite humbling to say the least, and slightly haunting. I guess if I have to say I learned anything from my old automotive flame tonight, it's this: my revolving door of daily driver vehicles has to come to an end, if not for the Astra's sake, then for its replacement.

I thought there were a few more rollouts for Chicago ...

I'm going to just sum this one up in one post. This is why you shouldn't let a Ram 1500 and Ford F-150 breed. I just got off the phone with the F-150. It wants its interior back. U-G-L-Y! You ain't got no alibi! You UGLY! Yeah, yeah, you UGLY! They finally fixed the god-awful interior, but only because they decided to plagiarize Ford. Look! It says exactly what it is right on the side there. A turd. All of the above is true, but the tailgate is kinda cool. /thread

Actually there's sound logic in merging the Equinox and the Trax in the future.

Agreed. First, Ford makes every Lincoln look like a modern Chinese knock-off of a '70 Cutlass, then they subconciously pay homage to old Oldsmobile ad campaigns. At this point, Ford should just rename Lincoln "Oldsmobile" and get it over with.

Well, other than the Jeep Compass/Patriot and Dodge Caliber, I don't think there are a lot of options out there ...

Yeah speaking of that, I'm not going to lie here, GM needs to decide where in the hell they want to place the center stack vents in just about all of the low-end Gamma-platform cars. The Onix, the Trax, the Spin, and the Sonic (the only exceptions are the new Brasilian Cobalt and, oddly, the Spark) all have those ugly vertical storage bins on the sides of the center IP that looks like GM initially wanted to put HVAC vents there, but decided that it was either too expensive or simply looked too good.

Awww poor wittle babby got his feelers hurt. black knight............where did you come up with that thought? Are you a preteen or what? I don't get your juvenile remark There's a lot that you don't seem to get. Well black knight ................... enlighten me. Come on speak up like a man if you have something to say. No need to add emoticons or act like a child ..... What is it you have to say? Well, my my. Isn't that precious! Look who got out of bed and decided to be a big boy today! Did you graduate from Pull-Ups all on your own or did mommy help you? Drop the psuedo-macho smart-ass attitude and quit making feeble attempts to troll threads first and then we'll really talk man to man. This thread was content being a year-old and virtually dead before you decided to step in with your absolutely brilliant "CRUZE IS A DERP DERP DERP" post. As a matter of fact, you've contributed very few relevant posts since you've been on here. It isn't a big deal if you bring a thread back from the grave, but at least add to the discussion (for once) and be constructive. On the whole, your posts look like the inflammatory ramblings of an infantile simpleton.

Everything sub-KL Cherokee is, honestly, just a little bit of a mess over at Jeep right now. Call it a hunch, but I don't think everyone at Jeep shares Manley's vision for the brand. The NG Compass is supposed to use a model specific version of the CUSW platform that pins the Dart and KL Cherokee and will be close to the current Patriot in size. I keep hearing different things related to its capabilities, so I'm trying to keep the jury out for now. However, I will say that I'll be suprised if it turns out to be more capable than the current model. The "B-Segment" Jeep was initially supposed to use a revised version of the SCSS platform that currently pins the Fiat Grande Punto and Opel Corsa D. However, current reports coming from Fiat India's head-honcho, Enrico Atanasio, indicate that the B-Segment model would be unique from any related Fiat version. I will add that I doubt that it won't have a related Fiat model, and that it will be more capable than the current/upcoming Compass. I guess that would be better than just seeing a Punto dressed up like it was in a few hundreds of dollars worth of North Face and L.L. Bean gear, but we'll see.

That's funny because, considering what I keep hearing from Manley, it probably isn't too far from the truth.

One more thing, as much as I've bashed Bernhard so far, I think Mike Manley is probably just about as worse. He's made remarks about the future of the Wrangler that really, really concern me. Example (from GoAuto):

Awww poor wittle babby got his feelers hurt. black knight............where did you come up with that thought? Are you a preteen or what? I don't get your juvenile remark There's a lot that you don't seem to get.

Well, like I mentioned earlier, that's likely a by-product due in part to Bernhard's revisions which made the KJ smaller (and poorly packaged versus the XJ), heavier, and top-heavy. Jeep engineers already had some of the basic structure work ready when Bernhard demanded that the KJ become smaller, and it was probably too expensive at that point to just pack up and go back to the drawing board and totally start fresh to meet his expectations. I'm also pretty sure that Jeep was probably going to go with coils initially for the KJ considering that the '99 WJ Grand Cherokee still had them. Hastily chopping the structure down and re-engineering it to accept a IFS layout are probably two of the biggest reasons why a KJ has such a sloppy ride. I'll also quote an interesting exerpt from an article over at Allpar that was written by a former Chrysler/AMC engineer, Evan Boberg, on this one as well:

By the way, from my understanding this is close to what the KJ Liberty originally started out as: It was originally much more like the XJ, except slightly larger with much better packaging.

That's precisely the problem. There will be people who will show up at Jeep dealers trading in their old XJs for the new KL model expecting off-road capability matching or exceeding that of the XJ. That won't be the case. If anything, there's a reputation on the line that stands to be damaged. Some hardcore Jeepers who have also managed to see the KL ahead of debut have also condemned it far worse than I have so far. They already want the outgoing KK Liberty back, and I think that says something. You're right in the fact that the current WK2 Grand Cherokee costs too much coin for your average Joe to use it as a serious trail rig. However, it is quite capable for a big luxo-barge SUV. I think there are two reasons for that. One, the Grand Cherokee is the flagship model and, because it is in a position of prestige at the brand, customers expect it to have capability worthy of the Jeep name. The second reason is a little less obvious, but if you know the history of the Jeep brand it makes sense. When the late '70s to early '80s Grand Wagoneer was around, it was exceptionally popular for the time, despite the fact it was based on 20 year-old-plus engineering and design. Even folks who bought Audi 80s and BMW 5ers found no issue in parking a Grand Wagoneer in their garage at night. The Grand Wagoneer was a very ruggedly-built yet plush SUV for the time, and was just as well made as any Range Rover while coming in significantly cheaper. When AMC dealers recognized the wealthier clientelle that were showing up on their lots, they saw an opportunity to make even more money and began asking AMC to make the Grand Wagoneer even more plush and more expensive, pushing the price closer to Range Rover territory. For whatever reason, AMC decided against that idea (much like the XJ situation over at Chrysler in the '90s, AMC was probably afraid to take a risk on messing with something that already made them a good amount of profit). What used to be true for the Grand Wagoneer is now becoming true of the Grand Cherokee. Give it some time and I guarantee it will grow even further in price to become America's answer to the Range Rover. But in order for the Grand Cherokee to be worthy competition for the established Range Rover, it needs to retain its off-road capability to keep up. While the JK Wrangler and Wrangler Unlimited would be acceptable alternatives for current XJ owners (they certainly match or exceed the XJ in prowess and dependability), the JK falls horribly short where the XJ always excelled and will excell: price. The JK, bluntly put, is way too goddamn expensive for what it is (read: pretty damn basic transportation; while I really do love the Wrangler, it's honestly about as lavish as a third-world port-a-john). A decent JK will set you back at least $27,000, and that's just a stone's throw away from WK2 money. As for the old KJ and KK model Liberties, their biggest downfall was weight. Granted, that porky curb weight was partially due to the change from a front coil-link suspension to IFS, but that was also because Bernhard and his group of cronies that flew ship from Daimler revised the KJ product plans to make it more of a competitor to RAV-4 of the time. That included revising the dimensions of the KJ, which was already being developed when this decision was made (this also explains why the KJ looked so tall and "pushed-in"). Because Bernhard wanted the KJ to have a smaller footprint comparable to the RAV-4 and have IFS to address the blighted criticisms the automotive press had about the XJ's coils, the weight went up. However, they are still mostly competent off-roaders when lightly modified. To be fair, even though a stock XJ Cherokee will fair better than a stock KJ or KK Liberty out in the rough stuff, the XJ requires some very basic and inexpensive mods in order to be a really worthy trail rig.

Good and luck, BMW. For some reason, this idea makes me think of someone gluing a BMW badge onto a Fiat Barchetta.

Awww poor wittle babby got his feelers hurt.

There are a few reasons why Chrysler executives rechristened the Cherokee as the Liberty in North America. The main and seldom known reason is that demand remained very steady and sustainable for the old XJ Cherokee, even after the original ZJ Grand Cherokee came on board to replace it in 1993, and the KJ and XJ models were supposed to be sold side by side for a few years, similar to how the ZJ and XJ remained on sale side by side. There were quite a few people at Chrysler at the time that were afraid to mess around too much with what had been a very popular model and big cash cow for the company (the development for the XJ was basically paid for by the late '80s/early '90s, I believe). You also more than like have Wolfgang Bernhard's vicious vendetta to thank for killing the Cherokee name as well. As for the new Cherokee, I do think that it will be a severe disappointment for those who are expecting an updated version of the original. Based on what I know about this new Jeep, it may turn out to be a little more capable than the current Compass by an extremely slim margin.

Welcome aboard! I guess this means that I'm no longer the lone Kentuckian sailing the Quaker sea 'round these parts.