Inappropriate car ad descriptions

[Drew Dowdell]

I have a search set up on Autotrader to send me Avalanche listings.  One of the most common eyeroll descriptions I see for Avalanches is "Fuel Sipper" or "best fuel economy" or some variant.

While the Avlanche might be decent as far as trucks of that vintage go.... it's not like it's a Volt in the MPG department.... it's not even a Chevy SS in the MPG department.... and putting that in the ad isn't fooling anyone.

What doozies do you see in car ads that are wildly inappropriate to the vehicle they are selling?

[G. David Felt]

LOL, the one that cracks me up is when I see Ultimate Off road capable for a 2wd RWD/FWD CUV. Are people really that stupid to not realize that the 2wd RWD/FWD CUVs are pretty much on road drivers only? This seems to be very common for Jeep posting of 2WD wranglers, Patriots, Compass, etc.

[A Horse With No Name]

[Drew Dowdell]

huh?

[Robert Hall]

4 hours ago, dfelt said:

LOL, the one that cracks me up is when I see Ultimate Off road capable for a 2wd RWD/FWD CUV. Are people really that stupid to not realize that the 2wd RWD/FWD CUVs are pretty much on road drivers only? This seems to be very common for Jeep posting of 2WD wranglers, Patriots, Compass, etc.

Like in AZ... it seems most CUVs and SUVs sold there are 2wd.  

[A Horse With No Name]

More of a confused buyer than a confused seller but...I asked one of the gentleman who helps purchase cars for our local Sherrifs department when Chargers were going to start replacing crown Vic. His answer was never, because they liked Ford products and the Charger was rear wheel drive, unlike the Crown Vic which was front wheel drive.  I suggested they look at a police package Fusion in that case.  He replied that they had gotten a test vehicle from Ford, and the deputies had been impressed. However everyone had been dismayed to find out the Fusion was rear wheel drive.

4 hours ago, Cubical-aka-Moltar said:

Like in AZ... it seems most CUVs and SUVs sold there are 2wd.  

Makes sense.

Edited June 14, 2017 by A Horse With No Name

[Drew Dowdell]

13 hours ago, Cubical-aka-Moltar said:

Like in AZ... it seems most CUVs and SUVs sold there are 2wd.  

Well, if you don't go off-road ever, then 2wd is fine for AZ.  It's not like you get a lot of snow.

[Robert Hall]

Just now, Drew Dowdell said:

Well, if you don't go off-road ever, then 2wd is fine for AZ.  It's not like you get a lot of snow.

True..though plenty of snow up in northern AZ....but for most people in the Phoenix area, CUVs/SUVs are people haulers for around town... 

[Drew Dowdell]

9 hours ago, A Horse With No Name said:

More of a confused buyer than a confused seller but...I asked one of the gentleman who helps purchase cars for our local Sherrifs department when Chargers were going to start replacing crown Vic. His answer was never, because they liked Ford products and the Charger was rear wheel drive, unlike the Crown Vic which was front wheel drive.  I suggested they look at a police package Fusion in that case.  He replied that they had gotten a test vehicle from Ford, and the deputies had been impressed. However everyone had been dismayed to find out the Fusion was rear wheel drive.

Me:

[A Horse With No Name]

46 minutes ago, Drew Dowdell said:

Me:

Humans are not getting any smarter....

[A Horse With No Name]

http://www.usedregina.com/classified-ad/ULTRA-RARE-2005-Chevrolet-Monte-Carlo-SS-Supercharged-Tony-Stewart-Edition_29554636

Ultra rare 2005 Chevy Monte Carlo....

Have you seen a "Tony Stewart" Monte Carlo SS? There were only 1020 built in the 2005 Model year. This is a US car that was brought into Canada a few years ago. Speedometer is in miles and the odometer can be either km's - 98000 or show miles of - 58000. Has a Super Charged 3800 V6. Car is fully loaded with Air, Tilt, Cruise, Power Windows, Power Locks, Power Seats, Sunroof. Factory alloys and Dual Exhaust. Beautiful car. Listing this for my Dad. So please call him if you are interested. Price is $10500.00

http://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/regina/pontiac-chevette-acadian-isuzu-diesel/1273024123?enableSearchNavigationFlag=true

Very rare Pontiac Chevette diesel...

1982 acadian 1.8 diesel auto runs and drives very well has rare power steering option ,good windshield 40 to 50 mpg great project car comes with a few parts included needs tires ball joints to be daily driver can be plated ,delivery is also available price is obo

[A Horse With No Name]

1958 Wartburg with a Chevy 350.///

Not so much inappropriate as just odd and unique...

https://miami.craigslist.org/mdc/cto/6136121173.html

[G. David Felt]

 

[A Horse With No Name]

This Van is Unique, Read the History on it before You decide on Buying/Investing.
First come first serve. Im not interested in bidding shoot me 1 offer and thats it.

Pros
This Van comes with a Perfect Fit Swap Made by Corvair to Be adjacent with the VW Bus System.
In this case the Van has More Power than a regular Stock VW Bus of its time.
Body all Fiber Glass so NO RUST on the Body.
Lighter Weight about 800LBS less than the Regular SAMBA.
Gives 23+ Miles per gallon.
Clean Rims
Still has the VIN Badge something You will probably see only on VW Buses that are sold for 7 Figures. Making this Car a Perfect Novelty to Restore.
I would Restore it, but I am looking for a BMW Vixen 21 RV.
Also Fun Fact this car Was featured in the Movie TOTAL RECALL.

Cons
Only rust is on the driver and Passenger feet,
And Under the Car around the rim or borders of the Undercarriage.
Car Does not start, Probably needs to be rewired.
Never bothered to turn it on or mess with it, I did not want to break anything.
I am not a Mechanic.
The Body has a few parts where the paint is chipping off, but at the end of the day its Fiberglass and You can restore it with no conflict of Find Parts for the body.
Rewiring Needed.
The Man who sold it to Me told Me He used to spray the Carbs and charge the battery, the car would start right up. I never bothered to do that. I haven't registered the car. I do have the Original Title with the signature of the last person who owned it. You would have to apply for a Title Transfer. The title is from Arkansas. Matching VIN on the Bade of the Van.
 

https://miami.craigslist.org/mdc/cto/6136121173.html

Still available...rush right out!

This car is great. no damage inside out. it was on cover of VOLKSWAGON MAGAZINE and i have the copy of the magazine and it tells the entire history of how the car came about to where it is today. i put a ordered rebuilt in last year and barley drove it because i bought a Saturn Sky and I'm so in love now with the SKY AND would keep the KARMAN GHIA but i want to put a big picture window in my BIG ROOM that looks out to a STORY BOOK VIEW so thats the only reason I'm selling it. IN other words if i did not want to put the STORY BOOK VIEW WINDOWN IN , I WOULD NOT SELL the car. some jealous student from VERMONT TECH KICKED THE TRUNK & THERE IS NO DENT DAMAGE BUT HAS TO BE TOTALY STRIPPED AND REPAINTED WHICH IS 500 DOLLARS. NOT MORE I CALLED THE BEST ANTIQUE CAR PAINTER ON THE EAST COAST AND THAT WHAT HE TOLD ME. AND THE MAN owned the car before me who was the one who got it on the cover of VOLKSWAGEN MAG had the car painted when he owned it 100% and i even have the color code numbers and receipt etc etc. etc. SO IF YOUR REALLY LOOKING FOR A GREAT KARMANN GHIA that is close to cherry. THIS IS THE CAR, the difference between buying from me vs other sellers. I DONT LIE! I WILL SHOW U THE GREAT ABOUT THE CAR IN MY OPINION. and will show you the BLATANT few flaws that can be fixed perfect. SO I WOULD LIKE TO SELL FAST BECAUSE I WANT TO PUT THE WINDOW IN. but its also a race for any one interested! because any moment I'm waiting for a business call THAT IS COME-ING 100% SURE i just am not SURE WHEN BUT I KNOW ITS CLOSE. AND THAT DAY IM LOADED FOR THE REST OF THIS LIFE. so when the day comes if its before i sell the car. the car will NO LONGER BE FOR SALE! SO THE time clock on the sale of this car is tick-KING AND TICK-KING SO THE RISK IS REALLY YOURS YOU THE BUYERS. BECAUSE I KNOW THE MARKET, YOU WONT FIND A BETTER KARMANN GHIA FOR THE PRICE!
O HERE TO HERE FOR VIDEO ON YOU TUBE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wn2qSWcFbFs

Ironically, owner says it is a front wheel drive karman Ghia....VERY RARE!

[A Horse With No Name]

Advert is expired, but Cummins Turbo diesel continental...

...was Actually on our very own Columbus Ohio Craigslist!

Not inappropriate but Cool:

HANDS DOWN ONE OF THE BIGGEST BADDEST HOT ROD ON THE PLANET!!

Well I really pain's me to sell my ridiculous creation my son named "THUNDERHEAD" before I got the chance to completing the project. But I haven't had any time to work on it in over 3 years and don't see anything changing in the near future. So it's time to "let it GO"! I asking $50,000 OBO
I could go on for hours explaining the details of the build but I'm going to give you a brief overview of the work that has been done.
The Steel cab is from a 1957 KENWORTH that I chopped 6" out of the top and I stretched the cab 7" through the doors and roof. The sleeper is from a 359 Pete. The 35' frame rails I had custom formed out of 3/8" A110 steel plate that's 100,000 tinsel strength frame rail material. The New # 16,000 ZF Independent front suspension with air disk brakes is used in high end charter busses and top of the line motorhomes builders. The AG380 rear suspension is out of a 2007 KENWORTH W900 and the Eaton 404 rear ends have 342 gears. The wheel base is 335" but with the ZF frontend it has a much tighter turning radius then a typical straight axel.
Where do I start with the incredible 12V71 DETROIT DIESEL engine, the motor I removed from a generator set with an extremely low 806 running hours on the meter. Sitting on top of the massive 12 cylinder block is a set of twin 671 Blowers and 2 new Enderle Big and Ugly injector hats. I had header flanges lazar cut from 5/8 steel plate and I custom built the 3" Zoomy exhaust, that's truly where the name "THUNDERHEAD" came from. This thing sounds like nothing I have ever heard. I also have a custom 2 pass Aluminum radiator built to handle up to 1400 horse power. I have an Allison HT740 automatic transmission in the truck and a spare
Rebuilt transmission to go with it. I have new bear claw latches for the doors new power windows kits and electric wipers and wiring harness the boxes. I have most of the heavy lifting done with this Project truck and I don't have any dough who ever get to finish this project will get worldwide recognition.
I have a lot of time and money into this truck and when completed I believe it could fetch $500k + at Barrett Jackson. So if you don't have the money please don't waste our time.
You can see some videos of exactly what stage it is currently at by copying and pasting the youtube links

 

 

[A Horse With No Name]

1980 Dodge Omni Electrica 007 Electric Car

7500 miles. Only 10 of these electric vehicles where made. These vehicles were taken from Dodge by Jet Electric as new cars without the gasoline motor and fitted with a 9 inch GE electric motor and GE controller. Car has 120V battery pack. Batteries are 2 years old. Car has 20 mile range with current batteries. When batteries where new range was 70 miles. Charger operates on 220 volts. Takes about 10 hours to charge when fully depleted. 4 speed manual transmission. Car has a gasoline heater.

[Drew Dowdell]

That Pontiac diesel is actually probably quite rare.  I think @balthazar was guessing that is might have been extinct. 

The Monte Carlo isn't rare at all.. it's a sticker package. 

The Electric dodge is interesting if mislabeled.

[G. David Felt]

16 minutes ago, A Horse With No Name said:

1980 Dodge Omni Electrica 007 Electric Car

7500 miles. Only 10 of these electric vehicles where made. These vehicles were taken from Dodge by Jet Electric as new cars without the gasoline motor and fitted with a 9 inch GE electric motor and GE controller. Car has 120V battery pack. Batteries are 2 years old. Car has 20 mile range with current batteries. When batteries where new range was 70 miles. Charger operates on 220 volts. Takes about 10 hours to charge when fully depleted. 4 speed manual transmission. Car has a gasoline heater.

 

[A Horse With No Name]

46 minutes ago, Drew Dowdell said:

That Pontiac diesel is actually probably quite rare.  I think @balthazar was guessing that is might have been extinct. 

The Monte Carlo isn't rare at all.. it's a sticker package. 

The Electric dodge is interesting if mislabeled.

IIRC Balthazar and I were talking about the Chevette Scooter diesel being extinct, as it was the only two seat diesel passenger car ever built by GM.

[A Horse With No Name]

This low mileage (under 21,000 miles), one-of-a-kind truck/camper/car carrier is named Bulla Matari meaning "breaker of rocks" from the explorer, Henry Morgan Stanley. Bulla was built to carry a Porsche Spyder, pull a 30 foot sailboat, carry a motorcycle in front, 18 ft kayak with mast and sail on top, bicycles on the rear while functioning as a camper with propane stove, refrigerator, microwave, hot water tank, air conditioning unit, wood fireplace, safe, awning and sleeps 4 adults.

This Ford 350 6L diesel, dual wheels, Lariat Pkg = leather seats and trim, 5-speed transmission, 4WD, and ABS brakes, 17" forged polished aluminum wheels, AM/FM/CD, air conditioning, automatic temperature control.

Additional instruments: Temperature, Pyrometer, Volts, and "Panic Button" (Train whistle). Power: brakes, steering, windows, mirrors. Has passenger airbag, front fog lights, front ready lights, fully automated headlights, front-center armrest w/storage, back seat folding seats. Load Lifter 5000 air springs by Airlift; 3 winches: front one is Warn Dual Force HD 12,000 electric "PowerPlant" hoist; second electric hoist is 1300 lbs by Central Machinery; third is on top of the truck.

The camper has settees that make into a double bed (pictured); a singled bed over the cab and back seats are folded back with a take in or out bed. Ramps for loading car are mounted on sides of truck. To change camper into car-carrier, the stove and sink rise to the ceiling and the double bed is raised over the car. You can see the bar across the windows where the bed fits.
One owner, clean title, well-maintained, current registration and smog certificate, low-low mileage, non-smoker.

[A Horse With No Name]

Reliant Robin for sale...

978 Reliant Robin; Disassembled, needs a committed soul for rebuilding.

If you are looking for something very unique this may be for you. There are very few of these in the States. Made famous on BBC, Mr Bean and Top Gear (the infamous "let see how easy it rolls" segment).

I can't really tell you much. I purchased it in 2008 with the intent of doing *something* with it (I envisioned a 900 pound electric car...). It has set in our barn for these past 8 years. I can't vouch that all the parts are there; it does appear that most of the important things are.

Missing back hatch glass (shattered); a fairly easy replacement. Only one front seat (doesn't look original, but then again, how would I know?). Back seat must be original as the padding is only 2" thick and terrible uncomfortable. One door needs fiberglass repair.

The vehicle comes with a "Oregon Salvage Title Certificate" and a bill of sale. I talked to the DMV (8 years ago) and they told me they would issue an Oregon MOTORCYCLE title if I brought it in for inspection; that it didn't need to be running, they just need to see it.

Price? There is nothing to compare it to! What are you thinking? Could we start the bidding at $900 (as-is)?

Here's a great video but don't let it scare you off. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQh56geU0X8

By the way, in case you may be confused, this is a 1978 Reliant Robin NOT a 1965 Shelby GT-350.

 

Also offered for sale...

[G. David Felt]

@A Horse With No Name That info on Reliant Robin is too funny. Video link is a hoot!  

[Drew Dowdell]

That Burbalanche....

[A Horse With No Name]

12 minutes ago, dfelt said:

@A Horse With No Name That info on Reliant Robin is too funny. Video link is a hoot!  

Glad you enjoyed it!

5 minutes ago, Drew Dowdell said:

That Burbalanche....

I figured since this started with an Avalanche...

Inappropriate plate anybody?

Inappropriate bus...

Inappropriate use of a sunroof...although it is creative...

[A Horse With No Name]

Gullwing RX-7 Anybody?

Just plain inappropriate...

[Drew Dowdell]

that gullwing is NEAT!

[A Horse With No Name]

This very customized Porsche 914 will soon cross the auction block at Hilton Head Island. The entire custom body is made from steel and features a front grill and lights from a second generation Chrysler Concorde and a rear from a C5 Corvette. The powertrain consists of a Chevy 350 ci V8 that produces 375 horsepower connected to a five-speed manual transmission. The front suspension and disc brakes were upgraded from a Porsche 911. Auctions America estimate the custom roadster will sell for $30,000-$35,000. If anyone knows more about this project please contact us or leave a comment.
 

The answer to a question nobody ever, ever, ever asked....

Yours for the paltry sum of $35,000

[A Horse With No Name]

1 hour ago, Drew Dowdell said:

that gullwing is NEAT!

I kind of thought it was a bit unique....

[Drew Dowdell]

1 hour ago, A Horse With No Name said:

This very customized Porsche 914 will soon cross the auction block at Hilton Head Island. The entire custom body is made from steel and features a front grill and lights from a second generation Chrysler Concorde and a rear from a C5 Corvette. The powertrain consists of a Chevy 350 ci V8 that produces 375 horsepower connected to a five-speed manual transmission. The front suspension and disc brakes were upgraded from a Porsche 911. Auctions America estimate the custom roadster will sell for $30,000-$35,000. If anyone knows more about this project please contact us or leave a comment.
 

The answer to a question nobody ever, ever, ever asked....

Yours for the paltry sum of $35,000

do you have a link to that listing? 

[A Horse With No Name]

2 minutes ago, Drew Dowdell said:

do you have a link to that listing? 

No I do not....let me see if I can find it...

[A Horse With No Name]

http://blog.caranddriver.com/scary-franken-porsche-914-combines-corvette-bmw-and-chrysler-bits/

Car and driver article about it...

https://www.engineswapdepot.com/?p=12494

Check out the engine swap depot link...