Changes

[Cory Wolfe]

"I'm going through change-ehh-es... I'm going through change-ehh-eess" 

 

Sing, Ozzy, sing. 

 

Anyhow... nothing like a little Black Sabbath to announce changes. As you may remember, I moved to Michigan in the spring for various photography endeavors. It was a fairly substantial change of pace for me and a real opportunity do something with one of my hobbies. It was something I had only dreamed of tackling up to that point. To say the least, I certainly won't regret what transpired this summer, especially the bittersweet ending. However, the experience was mired by a sour agreement before I was even able to begin.

 

Going back, I arrived with an overwhelming nervousness about beginning self-employment in a relatively unfamiliar arena. Beyond having to make my own way to success, I had nothing to fall back on beyond my savings. The move itself had already depleted most of what I had, leaving me very little to start with. At the point, I wasn't really worried, though. Nervous as I was, there was a fair amount of excitement, as well. Being the pessimistic optimist that I am, I was weary of the worst, but not terribly worried. It wasn't until I finally got settled in that I received what would be the first in a string of bad-news about the first job I would be doing. Essentially, the publication that I would be doing photography for decided the budget was blown and would have to eventually cut back before I even had a chance to start. Exactly the opposite of what I wanted to hear from what was supposed to be my steady income. Luckily for me, this didn't materialize right away and I soon ignored the looming insecurity. From there until June, things were going fine on that front and I was really enjoying the ride. On the other end of the spectrum, making a living on being a 'carparazzi', as I'll call it, was seemingly impossible. 

 

After a couple months flew by, it really seemed as if everything would work out. I was making progress with my photography, I managed to get shots of a few upcoming cars, and was able to sustain myself financially while doing something I really enjoyed. It was great and I was having the time of my life. With my experiences, I wanted to branch out and add some writing to the mix on top of everything else. All was going well... Until it wasn't. I soon received word that the publication I was doing photography for was ending the feature the photography was for. In other words, I lost my steady income. This marked the beginning of a very long roller-coaster ride with a long steady drop and a few short, sweet rises all at the end. It was at this point that I started second-guessing the sustainability of making a living. I started looking for a replacement job, though, I found it difficult to find anything worthwhile. As I searched, I continued the 'carparazzi' photography in hopes of shooting something of importance. This, however, was a fruitless endeavor, as the industry seemed to just stop working for what seemed like an eternity. Day after day, dollar after dollar, I had nothing. Eventually, I was as broke as I've ever been, my spirits as low as they've been in a long, long time. 

 

It's not until I suffered through nearly two months without income that I began to realize the risks of self-employment in this field. I was, without a doubt, out of options. I began to devote all my time towards finding some sort of immediate employment. It was at this moment that I started to succumb to all the stress of everything happening around me. After unsuccessful attempts to find a job, I had given up. I handed in my 30 day notice to vacate my apartment and made plans to move back to Pennsylvania. Having done that, I never could have expected what happened next.

 

Figuratively, it was akin to a light switch being flipped on. One day I'm dead broke, the next... Well, I had decided (or rather, I was persuaded) to go out one more day. It was a Friday, which, before the two month long lull, was usually an active day. I didn't have high hopes, but what the hell. I thought I'd have just another lousy day. Before long, it was anything but. As I looked through the lens, it became apparent that I had finally shot something big. This was something I had looked for all summer long to no avail, and yet, there it was. It was very surreal, to the point that I didn't want to get excited. After all, if my streak of luck was any indication, this would obviously be another fluke. My expectations remained low. The following week was, quite possibly, the longest week of my life, or so it felt. Did I finally have a worthwhile sale? Will these photos backfire? Am I going to make it? The thoughts endlessly raced through my head as I awaited the news. Suddenly, it happened. One by one, more news outlets picked up the photos. You know that surreality I mentioned? The feeling was ten-fold this time. The next week, I decide to go out once more Monday morning just in case something else shows up. And you know what? It happened again. In fact, these two weeks would be my most successful ever. By the end of July, my luck had completed a 180 degree turn. 

 

It's worth noting that, with the success I finally achieved, I considered reversing my decision to move back. In fact, I had nearly turned the corner completely and was leaning towards staying in Michigan. As my 30 day notice came to a close, I eventually came to the decision to move after-all. While it would have finally been feasible to make a living like I finally did, my thoughts centered around the risk of doing so. In determining the risk versus reward, and having just had the lowest of lows back to back with highest of highs, I had to recede back to my hometown.

 

Some of my best memories will be from Michigan. I have no regrets, all-around.

 

-----

 

Now that I'm back in Pennsylvania, I've been doing some soul-searching to figure out what my next move is. Whether I want to continue photography, or dabble with writing or design or one of my other various random interests remains to be seen. I guess its never too late to get a degree, either. We'll see.

[A Horse With No Name]

As a 49 year old guy thinking of going back into school to get an MBA, I can appreciate your courage!

[NINETY EIGHT REGENCY]

Wow.  Have no regrets and keep your head up and keep moving forward. Courage and conviction.

[daves87rs]

I had a crazy summer myself....wish I could have made plans to hang....as you were not far from me. Not in the cards, I guess...

 

 

I could see you doing more of that...as your pictures came out quite well.   But it can be nuts, as I wonder how our other phototogs make it out here sometimes...

 

 

Maybe you could do a mix of things?

 

 

 

I guess  I could say welcome to the club...I'm currently trying to reboot myself into something different as well. Might shoot for an MBA myself...