Friends & Lovers...

[Cory Wolfe]

I wish there were a lot of people who turned out to be, well, heterosexually-challenged LOL

[post="105104"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

I know... It sucks that I have to like someone who most likely isn't gay. :hissyfit: :yes:

[ocnblu]

Well, it's going to happen to you more times than a straight guy is going to fall for someone (a girl) who is gay. I know it's a pain in the tail, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

[Paolino]

Well, it's going to happen to you more times than a straight guy is going to fall for someone (a girl) who is gay.  I know it's a pain in the tail, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

[post="105513"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

Yeah, what is up with that?! I don't know how many times I find a straight guy I'm interested in, but to find a gay man? Whoah... there just isn't a decent one out there (well, a few, I just have no access to them).

[trinacriabob]

Yeah, what is up with that?!  I don't know how many times I find a straight guy I'm interested in, but to find a gay man?  Whoah... there just isn't a decent one out there (well, a few, I just have no access to them).

[post="105523"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

P-

Do you think you do this on purpose? I know men and women who seek things/people in life that they can't have just to drive themselves nuts. I wonder, because it has vestiges of it...the way you talk about your infatuation.

Someone/something you can have too easily is "eh, so what." Someone/something you can't have fuels the fire of desire, anger, or any other emotion you care to insert that keeps you juiced.

Is this what this is about?
You were critical about a person you could have (and you could be TOTALLY right...a total dweeb...I could hear the obnoxious accent you described already)
Yet, you rave about this person you can't have. And, your last quote, why can't you have access to "them"?... sounds so definitive.

Given that you love movies about Italian issues, have you seen "Mambo Italiano?" Is your life anything like that? A little different than what I expected (though I knew the general plot) and ALL of the characters were a little too much, too cliche and melodramatic as hell. (The only one I understood, in "context," was Yolanda - she was his live-for-the-moment, no bullshit aunt who sold out and did all the right things you are supposed to do, on the traditional Italian track, only to find she was miserable and then took a "drastic" step. I only understand her because there are so many people from that background who buy into the program because it's what's expected).

At any rate, back to you, is this the deal, because you agonize way too much? You remind me of so many high-drama Italians I know! :AH-HA_wink: :lol:

"Guido 3,000 miles away." Edited March 12, 2006 by trinacriabob

[Paolino]

P-

Do you think you do this on purpose?  I know men and women who seek things/people in life that they can't have just to drive themselves nuts.  I wonder, because it has vestiges of it...the way you talk about your infatuation.

Someone/something you can have too easily is "eh, so what."  Someone/something you can't have fuels the fire of desire, anger, or any other emotion you care to insert that keeps you juiced.

Is this what this is about? 
You were critical about a person you could have (and you could be TOTALLY right...a total dweeb...I could hear the obnoxious accent you described already)
Yet, you rave about this person you can't have.  And, your last quote, why can't you have access to "them"?... sounds so definitive.

Given that you love movies about Italian issues, have you seen "Mambo Italiano?"  Is your life anything like that?  A little different than what I expected (though I knew the general plot) and ALL of the characters were a little too much, too cliche and melodramatic as hell.  (The only one I understood, in "context," was Yolanda - she was his live-for-the-moment, no bullshit aunt who sold out and did all the right things you are supposed to do, on the traditional Italian track, only to find she was miserable and then took a "drastic" step.  I only understand her because there are so many people from that background who buy into the program because it's what's expected). 

At any rate, back to you, is this the deal, because you agonize way too much?  You remind me of so many high-drama Italians I know!  :AH-HA_wink:  :lol:

"Guido 3,000 miles away."

[post="105735"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

Bob, why do you spend so much time interpreting my life in depth? ;)

I refer to "them" because it's been so long since I've found someone that has sparked any interest at all, that has actually been attainable. John, well, started out as "attainable". He was completely possible. We hit it off, but when you would naturally segue from friend to "more than friends", he felt we were awesome as friends, but not awesome as "more". He feels we're similar in many respects and looking for the same thing, which, to a degree is true... and I can see that as a problem as he is different enough from me for me to be attracted to him (as I'm looking for someone who is not my identical twin, but someone who compliments me by having many, and pardon the word, opposite characteristics), but I'm not different enough from him to compliment him in the ways he likes.

So, we went the friends route. Unfortunately, I did something that I shouldn't have done, which is sleep with him. He looked at it as just casual fun between two buddies, and I tried to, but I can't just do that... I tend to have a lot of emotion involved when I'm sleeping with someone. Well, that emotion got displaced and I felt closer to him, but not in a "friends-only" way.

As for the drama, yeah, well, with him, there is. Not directly to him, but rather about him. I am calm and cool around him, but in the background, I'm wildly crazy about him. It's sorta fading, so that's a good thing. The drama is going out with the feelings.

Italians are emotional, you know this. However, don't picture me as this "drama queen" that has melodrama 24/7. John's only a very small portion of my life... there are a million other things in life that keep me well filled. I'd think it'd be a pretty empty life for me if all I had to dwell on was a sole friend. This is, however, a thread I started to talk about situations like this. Edited March 12, 2006 by Paolino

[trinacriabob]

Bob, why do you spend so much time interpreting my life in depth? ;)

Italians are emotional, you know this.  However, don't picture me as this "drama queen" that has melodrama 24/7.

[post="105744"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

I don't! I hope it didn't come off that way. Only when I'm on line and I read your details of how these things put you through some "gut wrenching"! I have so many friends who go through situations like this (dissimilar and similar contexts... and everything in between) and I seem to be "the listener" they unload on. For better or worse, it's a role I am accustomed to. Yikes.

Never once used the word "drama queen"...just INTENSE. It's just that the solution is more obvious than you make it to be. Move on, sever contact...and be happy. Capisce? Buona notte.

BTW, do rent that flick though....it's goofy, at best. Edited March 12, 2006 by trinacriabob

[Paolino]

It's just that the solution is more obvious than you make it to be.  Move on, sever contact...and be happy.  Capisce?  Buona notte.

BTW, do rent that flick though....it's goofy, at best.

[post="105747"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

Pero, non lo voglio fare. I would like to have him in my life, hopefully as a good friend one day--you know the type... the type of friend that feels like family. He'd fit the bill. And in the short time we've known each other, he's said the same of me.

A friend like him I don't want to pass up. So, se devo soffrire un po', va bene, lo farò.

Va bene? Mi capisci quello che dico? :)