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Posted

Um OK I had a customer come in this afternoon with a Sable, saying someone backed into him in a parking lot. He needed an estimate. He said the hood wouldn't open. I was expecting a need to call for a rental car by his initial description.

When I got out there, there was a tiny spot of black rubber residue on his right side fender from the Toyota SUV's tire that backed into him, no dent. I couldn't think of a reason why the hood would be affected from such miniscule contact, so I stood at the hood and asked the customer to pull the release while I pulled out every trick I could think of to persuade the hood to open.

Nothing worked.

I asked the customer to trade places with me. The hood release worked perfectly, the hood opened. So I asked him to try it again as I watched.

he was pulling the parking brake release handle...:mellow:

Posted

He said "what was I doing wrong?"

I strained to keep a straight face and answered "you were pulling the parking brake release handle."

"Dumb me," is how he responded. Hence my thread title.:blink::)

Posted

roflcopter. They simple don't teach you enough in driver's ed, and after that most people just don't learn anything about cars.

Want a driver's license? Ok here ya go, just take a 20 question test (which you can take any number of times till you pass) and go for a 10 minute drive with someone who probably hates their job.

Posted

working at Office Depot as a cashier i had a lady come in and buy a (then) top of the line 21"crt flat screen monitor to replace her defunct one. the very next day she brought it back sealed in the box to return it. seems the old one had come unplugged...

Posted
working at Office Depot as a cashier i had a lady come in and buy a (then) top of the line 21"crt flat screen monitor to replace her defunct one. the very next day she brought it back sealed in the box to return it. seems the old one had come unplugged...

Had an office mate call from downstairs at work & indirectly blame me for her Keurig coffee maker not working. I said I'd come look, since I just used it the morning before with no issue, and she's standing by it saying she had hit all the buttons, refilled with water, unplugged & plugged it back in, but nothing.

I looked under the table, plugged in a freely dangling cord, it came back on & I walked away trying not to say anything, uh, mean. Dumasse.

As for the hood thing...I did that on mom's Malibu with her & others in the car, actually looking for the parking brake. "Wait a minute..." as I had to get out & open/shut the hood...twice...DOH...

Posted

I remember in my blazer I did that. I went to pop the the hood while it was on ramps and it was a stick I popped the parking brake up and it rolled of the ramps down across the street and up the curb and stopped in the lawn across the street.

I couldn't stop laughing at my self.

Posted
I remember in my blazer I did that. I went to pop the the hood while it was on ramps and it was a stick I popped the parking brake up and it rolled of the ramps down across the street and up the curb and stopped in the lawn across the street.

I couldn't stop laughing at my self.

That would be pretty cool to see.....

Posted

I was having a really bad day at work and I received the following call that brought out the smart ass in me. The male on the other end of the phone was upset because "my little red button thingy kept catching his shirt sleeve when he would walk by!" "IT IS SOOOOO ANNOYING!" :confused0071:

It was the emergency stop button on the front of a bread slicer with 40 reciprocating serrated razor blades in it. Has to be there. Kind of a safety thing. But Smart Ass kicked in;

Me: "So it catches your shirt each time you walk by it?" :scratchchin:

Him: "Yes! And I Demand you send someone right over, o.k.!"

Me: "Sir, that needs to be on there to stop the machine in an emergency - it cannot be moved"

Him: "Well, can you take it off? I am tired of it nearly ripping my shirt every time I pass the machine!"

Me: "Tell you what, I will save you the service call. Get yourself a big hammer...the bigger the better. Take a big swing and knock that sucker right off the front of the slicer...end of problem! It is YOUR machine after all!" <<<<DRIPPING WITH SARCASM>>>> :P

Him: "Well, I will have to talk to the manager, I am not sure I am allowed to do 'service work' on a machine still under warranty."

Me: " You do that. Tell him that you want to rip a safety device off of the front of your slicer. I am sure that will go well!"

Him: "THANKS for your time."

15 minutes later, my father appears in my office, red-faced and quizzically looking at me. He asked if I indeed instructed a customer to take a hammer to his new machine. Still in smart ass mode, I replied "Well, he WAS going to check with his manager first."

I was then informed that HIM was on hold on line 1...and that he had not found a hammer, but did find a two-by-four and had indeed whacked the stop switch right off the front of his machine. :facepalm: And he needed to know WHY it no longer worked after following my instructions to a tee. :mind-blowing:

I told him he had used a two-by-four and NOT a hammer as instructed, so it would NOT be covered under warranty. :neenerneener:

Posted

At first, I thought about laughing. Then I realized this level of ignorance actually makes me irritated.

Seriously, have people become so lazy that all they think they need to know about a car is how to start it and put it into drive? People put more thought into how to make their complicated, morning breakfast cereal than understand how to operate something that can kill them.

Doesn't this piss anyone else off?

Posted
At first, I thought about laughing. Then I realized this level of ignorance actually makes me irritated.

Seriously, have people become so lazy that all they think they need to know about a car is how to start it and put it into drive? People put more thought into how to make their complicated, morning breakfast cereal than understand how to operate something that can kill them.

Doesn't this piss anyone else off?

Why, yes. Yes it does.

What is even more scary is the fact that the car's owner cannot read PICTOGRAMS...as in a picture of a car in profile with the hood open. It does not get ANY easier than that. And this moron is piloting a nearly 4,000 pound missle without a leash! Good Lord!

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