Doogie Howser 'MO

[Cory Wolfe]

Yea...I personally find the stereotypical flaming gay personality very, very irritating.  The bitchy, bull dyke/feminazi stereotype is equally annoying...

But there are far more flaming gay guys than feminazi lesbians in the world...and also since many more masculine lesbians are more low-key (as in knowing when to Chill Out) and in general operate at a lower frequency than flaming gay guys, yea the gay guys get more attention...and if that attention is negative then yes more negative attention...but I really don't think Americans overwhelmingly "don't disapprove of" lesbians but are revolted by gay men.  I just don't see it.  My friends have been assaulted and called nasty names with "dyke" keyed on their cars far too many times for me to believe that.

212909[/snapback]

Now that is something I can agree with. Be proud of who you are, but don't act or dress a certain way just because of a stereotype. Be yourself and don't follow others. It is annoying and it does put more baggage on our backs because of that.

As far as whether lesbians or gay guys are accepted more.... Three words: Girls Gone Wild.

Edited November 7, 2006 by blackviper8891

[Croc]

As far Lesbians vs Gay guys for which is accepted more.... Three words: Girls Gone Wild.

212915[/snapback]

My question though will always be: are they really lesbians? Maybe bisexual at best...but I still maintain it's more girls flashing and dancing together than actually having SEX with each other. I wouldn't even classify GGW as gay for pay...

Honestly...are two girls going out partying together and making kissy faces together any different than two guys going clubbing with one as a wingman? Yea, the guys aren't making kissy faces together for girls (AWKWARD!) but I'll bet you anything they'll be showing off biceps or something. Same thing...just a different way of expressing it.

[the_yellow_dart]

Sexuality DOES define a much bigger part of your life than the time it takes up though - just because it only takes "20 minutes" (*cough* lazy ass...) doesn't mean it's not more important than something that takes hours.

I would much rather have a wonderful woman to love and be looking for a job right now than my current situation - good job and single.

[trinacriabob]

Sexuality DOES define a much bigger part of your life than the time it takes up though - just because it only takes "20 minutes" (*cough* lazy ass...) doesn't mean it's not more important than something that takes hours.

212926[/snapback]

Listen, you, with the torn up airport (J/K :AH-HA_wink: )...ok...it IS a bigger part of an individual's OWN life. It shouldn't be a bigger part of someone's life for the purpose of someone else's edification.

[the_yellow_dart]

Fair enough.

I wish there was a gay version of Dave Chappelle - that is, a gay comedian who knew how to make jokes to make the differences between us seem silly. I think Chappelle did a lot for racial views by showing how silly a lot of the stereotypes are - and I believe a gay comic could do the same.

Anybody have comments on that?

[razoredge]

The extreme gay guy in that show Will and Grace, while at times could be called charming and funny could also become very annoying and even pathaticly helpless. I woud say he had a comedian approach.

Some people just have to understand that most of us straight men are never going to be completely comfortable around someone that behaves like this guy I just mentioned, we dont think "cute" is becoming of a man. Nor do we think soldier boots is becoming of a woman that isnt going to the woods to work. These things are not natural or the norm so its natural for people to be freaked out or repelled. Getting in our face proves nothing but annoyance and anoyance doesnt make friends.

I was fitted for a tux(Manhattan) for my buddies wedding on Staten Island back around 82/83. Well one thing I have always had is my looks, though fading. This guy was gay, no doubt, all bubbly and "cute", much like the acter I was talking about. Well didnt he have to be aggressive with me. My girlfriend and myself and my friend and his girlfriend were there, they laughed, it was funny, I smiled for a moment but this guy wouldnt lay off, literally trying to "pick me up" or the act there of. Everyone else got a laugh but I was quickly sick of it, had it been a girl, there would have been a cat fight right then but instead it was........funny ? but I had to tolerate it. I am not a fighter and actually very polite to everyone and anyone unless pushed, in this situation I could nor would do anything but leave. I was not impressed with this boys behavior. I have never been like that with girls. Gay men can be very very aggressive, there is something wrong there, and its bound to get ugly in certain situations. I dont need to be "paid compliment" by a man.............ew !

Some would say thats what we deserve for how we treat women but I for one have never been aggressive. There is a saying "couldnt get laid in a whorehouse with a fist full of fifties" well thats me. I cant just "do it" and refuse to use "pickup lines". I never understood rape either, thats really strange. We are all clearly not wired the same.

[the_yellow_dart]

Will and Grace was not targeted at young people, like Chappelle was. That's where true change can start, because young people are still forming their perceptions.

[Drew Dowdell]

I, for one, hated the character of Jack on Will & Grace simply because he didn't show that differences are small. I felt that he perpetuated the negative stereotype and just reinforced peoples view of gay people. I can't stand gay guys like that at all.

[The O.C.]

Wow I agree with a lot of what you've written there.  I've never understood the whole "coming out" thing myself, and my bisexual/lesbian friends and even a couple of my gay fraternity brothers have tried to explain it as some "personal thing that really helps some people"...but I don't feel this overwhelming need to have a straight pride march, shout from the rooftops that I'm straight, or make a flag about it...I just live my life as who I am.

Then again, this whole myspace revolution of "personal expression" seems to be all the rage these days...

212901[/snapback]

Yeah....but you as a straight man have never been "persecuted" for your sexual orientation.

"Coming Out" simply means being true to yourself and living your life as the person that you are. Being "out" to me means that I don't have to "hide" any part of my life.

You've never met me in person.....but I feel, and many people tell me, that I'm extremely "straight-acting"......in other words...no "flamer" and people say they'd never know I was gay unless I told them.

So I didn't "come out" so that I could start marching down the middle of main street in high heels wearing a pride flag.....I did it so that I could just BE NORMAL.

I did it so that I wouldn't have to worry inside me that someone I knew would "see me walking into a gay bar" or someone else would "see me holding hands at a restaurant with my boyfriend" or someone else would "wonder if I was gay because I'm hanging out with a group of known gay guys." Crap like that.

I also did I so I wouldn't be afraid to take my boyfriend to social functions with my straight friends.....also did it so that I could take the guy I love home to meet Mom and Dad.....things like that.

Sorry for babbling.....but maybe do you understand just a little bit more?

Most of the gay people that get the media attention for "coming out" are the fringe, small percentage. Unfortunately, that's only what most of the straight people (like you) see.....unless you have lots of close gay friends....?

[Drew Dowdell]

Some of these celebrities come out like this simply to end the "scandal". Look at all the speculation about Lance Bass, Rosie, Doogie, etc being gay. After they admit to it, it becomes a non-story.

It is fairly well known that Anderson Cooper is gay. He has been seen at the gay bars in D.C. many times. He doesn't hide it. I fear though that some "reporter" somewhere will decide to report on Anderson's closet and start harassing him. Then Anderson will end up on some "coming out" special with Barbara Walters.

[Croc]

OC: A person can live their life as they are and not hiding things without "coming out." There just doesn't need to be this big announcement. Denying is one thing...but not going out of your way to make sure the whole world knows is a completely different matter. Straight guys don't need to "come out" to be "normal" anyway...

[The O.C.]

OC: A person can live their life as they are and not hiding things without "coming out."  There just doesn't need to be this big announcement.  Denying is one thing...but not going out of your way to make sure the whole world knows is a completely different matter.  Straight guys don't need to "come out" to be "normal" anyway...

213071[/snapback]

"Coming Out" doesn't have any sort of "announcement" to it as a general rule.

It's more of an internal realization within oneself....and just a general way of how you handle yourself in your personal life.

Like I said before....the media catches the "fringe" that try to make an over-the-top statement about "coming out."

[Drew Dowdell]

When I came out 10 years ago, it seemed necessary to have a sit down "announcement" with the people I was coming out to. It was people's reactions that necessitated that.

These days, I treat it so a-matter-a-factly that coming out is as simple as introducing me partner to someone or keeping a picture of us on my desk.

I suspect that with celebrities, coming out on a national scale is needed simply to stop the whispers and speculation. For example, look at Chris at the beginning of this thread offering speculation on Anderson Cooper. Since he hasn't been on Barbara Walters yet, it's not widely known that he is gay. Even some gay guys don't "know" it yet, they just have their suspicions. Anderson Cooper being gay is still whispered about in that wink wink nudge nudge sort of way even though he makes little if any effort to hide it. If he came out on a national scale it would become a non-story after about a day.

I think that's the exact reason Neil Patrick Harris came out like this. Next week, it's non-news.

[Satty]

Come on Croc

212752[/snapback]

Hmmm....I may have caught something a little Freudian in my boredom induced re-readings.

[ocnblu]

How do you think he keeps his complection so creamy smooth? And that's not hair gel.

But seriously, I was at a family/friends of family function yesterday and some chick was eyeing me the whole time, talking me up and stuff. What should I have done? I think I may have played along somewhat. God, I need some contact.

[razoredge]

How do you think he keeps his complection so creamy smooth?  And that's not hair gel.

But seriously, I was at a family/friends of family function yesterday and some chick was eyeing me the whole time, talking me up and stuff.  What should I have done?  I think I may have played along somewhat.  God, I need some contact.

225880[/snapback]

geeze Blu...didnt it make you feel good ?

remember that CSN song "love the one your with"...girls really dont have cooties...well most of them that is...

[ocnblu]

Well I ain't gonna lie, yes, it made me feel good. Just not tingly in certain areas. :AH-HA_wink:

[trinacriabob]

Well I ain't gonna lie, yes, it made me feel good.  Just not tingly in certain areas. :AH-HA_wink:

225979[/snapback]

This thread is back to the forefront? Ocn, give it a rest! ARRGGGHH.

[ocnblu]

Mr. California Bob (more like South Dakota, but I digress), our boy SATTY brought this thread back from the dead with a post directed at me. I responded. Now you give it a rest, before you go blind. :AH-HA_wink:

[trinacriabob]

(more like South Dakota, but I digress)

Now you give it a rest, before you go blind. :AH-HA_wink:

226041[/snapback]

South Dakota? Never set foot there....

Whack...whack...whack...cheers!

[ocnblu]

:AH-HA_wink: We're cool, bud.

[razoredge]

Well I ain't gonna lie, yes, it made me feel good.  Just not tingly in certain areas. :AH-HA_wink:

225979[/snapback]

maybe you could have got her to lace on some leather, cat a nine, and call you biiiitch............ tingle, tingle

[ocnblu]

Um no, that's your gig. :AH-HA_wink: